Something changed!

I felt it yesterday...

I don't know what it was. But it came over me and shook me deeply. As I was on my knees, praying to God about freedom from all my brokenness and weakness, I felt His Presene come powerfully over me. And I think I had changed...

At least I think so. I never had something like this happen to me before so I have nothing to compare to. But I have high hopes for the future. God never touches me if He has no reason for it. He actually has a very good reason, I believe, why yesterday happened as it happened.

I cried a lot yesterday. With tears, pain and rejection came out, weakness was disappearing. It was a terrible agony, at times I thought my heart would stop beating. But God urged me on. "Keep going", He said, "keep giving it all to Me - until there is no more to give." And honestly, I was eventually physically tired of crying.

Thats when I began writing. I love writing down what God tells me lately. Writing is an awesome tool for me to focus my thoughts, while talking helps me to deal with my feelings and emotions. I began writing down God's Words for me early this year, and a teaching I heard a few weeks ago only encouraged me to continue further. I believe that what I write on paper is God's living Word and a message for me, because when I re-read it, it speaks deeply into my heart.

So, I am excited. Really! I have no idea how the change will affect my life and ministry. But I suspect that this painful process was really necessary for me to grow. I do not seek change, but rather growth - yet as I grow I can't help but change. I leave it all in God's hands now. He will provide.